Keanuthon

5:50pm. Matt has seen this movie at least three times in the theater as an 11-year-old kid. His mom would drop him off at the cinema to watch it by himself. And we question why he turned out the way that he did. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

When you’re sliding into first and you feel something burst.
When you’re sliding into third and you laid a juicy terd.
When you’re sliding into home and your pants are full of foam.
When you’re sitting in your Chevy and your feeling something heavy.
Diarrhea

Crappy gets a new coat. It is a new episode. Watch Crappy run.

Jeff has decided to take an early evening nap – what this means for the later this evening or the days to come, who knows? Maybe he needs to sleep every 6 hours to regenerate. Maybe he is getting old, but he is younger than Matt – so I worry. I am comforted, but still troubled.

Sometimes you know when you wake up form your nap and you are deeply shocked to find that you are all alone (save for mom) in the cruel dark world with no one but Steve Martin and Mom to comfort you and nothing but the thoughts of absent loved ones to keep you going? You know. Huh?

I just got back up from mom that Matt has in fact been in the bathroom all day (this is apparently where he is now, while I am slaving away watching movies). I don’t know exactly how this relationship is supposed to go, but I’ve been in the living room all day watching Keanu Reeves’ movies, while Matt meanwhile has been sleeping and showering and napping and pooping. Does that seem fair?

But what does fairness really mean? Cannot a man or a woman or an animal of undistinguished and undefined sex/origin not be allowed to poop on his/her/its time without someone wondering where he is or if he is doing #1? If you cut this said thing does it not bleed? If you feed it a high fibre (or even fiber) diet, will it not need to poop? Will you allow it?

Gary, I’m disappointed in you. I thought by now with all of the effort I have put in, that you would know how to appropriately break into someone’s office and cover your tracks. I am very disappointed. Very disappointed.

(the speech Leaf’s mom should have given him)

They’ll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.

We are drinking as many stations as we possibly can.

That’s it.