Keanuthon

7:03pm. Keanu leaves Lauren Graham because she wants him to meet her parents. Or talk to him. Or leave the lights on during…Women!

The Holy Keanuit is not limit by time or space (he also assumes that CNJ can delete this if necessary)...two things:

Number 1:

Kepler just fell asleep here at my house which limits the chances of me coming to at most 22% and more realistically about 8%. Nej could call and make a decision that would lead to an asleep-kepi-drop-off-in-Talent, which would let me make a later arrival to Keanu’s Thong, but I doubt it.

Number 2:

In that klog from the documentary I can’t help but wish that the distinction was made between the two Jeff’s in the part in which CNJJEFF mentions that God created such a perfect Earth that we little humans can’t harm it. The other White Jeff isn’t sure how much it ultimately matters that we break Earth, but can’t help but wonder what effect thousands upon thousands of factories have upon the earth that make, burn, synthesize and bubble strange substances, when he has seen, repeatedly what effect his flatulence has on a lit match. On the other hand, the former white Jeff was probably joking, you know, pulling a Keanu.

Number :D
We all know, in reality, the earth will sort itself out. Not that there is anything wrong with it. If this does not occur before Jesus returns, all the saved souls will ascend and leave the unenlightened fools to enjoy their eternal damnation anyway. And bubble wrap is very important in all of our lives. Also I try not to pull my Keanu during the ‘Thon – I am trying to avoid injuries.

Put a fake nose on and win an Oscar. I am wearing a fake nose, right now.

The only reason to name a kid Abner is if you want him to get beaten up while wearing his HyperColorGenerra pants. Or hope he will invent baseball.

Current ‘Thon attendance is 8 – our highest viewing audience ever. If Falzoné makes it we would, well, have another person here.

Does she have the vegan sausage or the Colombo? Does Colombo make a vegan sausage? Is she a vegan or a virgin?

We are worried we had a meeting with Edgar Price last Friday and we missed it. We have seen monkeyshit fights at the zoo that were more organized than our scheduling.

Brand new Keanu. All over town for the biggest Thanksgiving movie we could ever plan. Well, the biggest Keanu Thanksgiving movie we have.